I was watching ‘Please Give’ with a friend assuming that this was to be one’s average cinema experience. We sat down, watched the adverts, watched the trailers (I could watch trailers all day) then braced ourselves, ready to watch the film.
As I looked up at the so-called silver screen, waiting for some bright colours, but it seemed that the screen today was indeed to be silver! A black and white light bulb became the center piece for this confusing moment. Ah well, perhaps this is a strange intro they’ve decided on.
“Directed by Francis Ford Coppola” okay, well, I suggested to my friend that maybe it’s a short before the film, no this actually is ‘Tetro’ and it is a real film. At this exact moment every single other person in the audience comes to exactly the same conclusion and starts to panic in that uniquely understated British way.
“What’s going on?”
“This isn’t the film! Hey! This isn’t the right film!”
(Looking up at the projector) “You’ve put the wrong movie in mate!”
Soon enough a kind lady came in and explained what had gone wrong and assured us that the right film would be in in no time. I on the other hand was starting to enjoy the Coppola film. But the actual film (‘Please Give’) was soon ready to roll and we were watching it. However, this was now no ordinary screening, for we as an audience had gone through a bonding experience, like we’d spent six months in the trenches together or survived a bank heist. Every joke in the film was funnier (for most) and people seemed to be much more open.
Around ten minutes into the film, just as the characters really began to establish themselves an old woman sat next to me pipes up and exclaims “this is the most boring film I have ever seen in my whole entire lifetime!” I was rather thrown off then, I didn’t know what to think, was she right? It’s amazing how one person’s opinion can very quickly change a situation. Thankfully, in my mind I brushed her off as an old fogy who doesn’t get modern cinema, and quite happily galloped upon my high horse for a good while.
Just as the film was nearing it’s end and reaching the emotional climax, we began to hear loud chatting noises emitting from just outside the fire exit door. Evidently two teenagers were having a fag and a gossip outside, but ruining the film for us in the process. Obviously, being British we tutted and did nothing about it, however we had already overcome one mountain, could this be the moment where we defeated our second dragon? A big fat lass waddles and stomps her way over to the door, swings it open and shouts, “Excuse me! We trying to watch a film in here, can you shut up!” Wow. We all clapped and cheered.
At least this didn’t happen: